just a thought

I was watching MOMS yesterday and their topic was "The Highs and Lows of Motherhood". They said that being a mother is the hardest occupation in the world -- probably because, no mother has stopped being a mom. Being a mom is being selfless, thinking of your family, your kids before yourself -- always. That's how my mom is anyway. And now that I'm going to be a mom in a few weeks, I was thinking, can I be a good mom just like how my mom is to me? Will I be as selfless as she is? As caring? As loving? As forgiving? I'll try. I'll do my best.

When my older sister left to be with her husband, I saw the hurt in my mom's eyes. I was so proud of her that day. She didn't cry. Back when my sister was starting College in Cavite, I remembered my mom sweeping the floor several times, checking all corners of the room, trying to pass time just so we can be with my sister longer. I remember her crying all the way home. But when my sister moved to Tarlace to be with her husband, my mom didn't cry. But everytime my sister would txt and inform us of what's happening, I know my mom wanted to run to her and make her feel better. Yesterday, watching the show "MOMS", they mentioned that sometimes, our kids would need to hurt us to let us know that they're growing up. And that's going to make us realize that we need to let go.

Today is my sister's birthday. I sent her a message last night, as soon as the watch turned 12mn. I told her, in the last 30years that we've been together, today is probably the first time I don't get to see her on her birthday. In the past, I would usually drive to wherever she is and see her on her birthday, but Tarlac is just so far away -- especially with my pregnancy. I told her, probably, it really is about time to let go and grow up. But she knows I love her. And I'll always be here whenever she needs me, ready to give my unconditional love.